Deleted post

So Camille thinks that I should have left my therapy session (post) on the blog. Well, maybe, but it's gone now and I won't really try to repeat what I said because I have worked through some of my feelings and it's not the middle of the night now - a time when thoughts seem so much stronger. I will recap a little of my thoughts for the heck of it.

• Yes, it was a little lonely having Rick walk away from our pew on Sunday, but I will most likely be fine most Sundays. Besides, he was helping pass the sacrament with the deacons on many Sundays.
• I won't be able to talk to him about his calling like I used to be able to, but there's plenty that I don't want to know about, anyway.
• Rick is going to be VERY busy. The phone rings a lot for him now. The bishop calls every day at least once and the other counselor calls, too. Last night the 1st counselor called trying to reach Rick to see if he'd gotten anyone to speak on Sunday - I don't think Rick even knew he needed to do that this week.
• Even though Rick will be gone more, the kids are very proud of him. Bryant bore his testimony on Sunday and he started off like this "When my dad told me he was going to be 2nd counselor, I was SHOCKED! (laughs from the congregation) He's going to be "eyeing" me (from the stand) ALL DAY LONG! (more laughs from the congregation)" He then went on to share a very sweet testimony. He even mentioned how he's going to miss President Hinckley's smile which made one ward member cry after having kept her composure during his death and all through the funeral. Another ward member said that when Bryant grows up, he's going to give Mitt Romney a run for his money.
• Leaving a legacy for our children. This is something that I've thought a lot about these past few days. When I went to the temple on Friday night, I had Grandma's embroidery with me. It reminded me that Grandma loved the temple and that I can remember her and honor her each time I am in the temple. That is something that I want to pass on to my children.
• Last, but not least, I am much more emotional than I used to be. Yes, I've teared up a lot lately. I can be sad, happy, lonely or just moved by the spirit. I am very uncomfortable showing emotion which I think is a flaw of mine. On the other hand, I don't want to be known as the one who cries at everything.

So there you have it, in a nutshell, most of my thoughts that I deleted off of my blog but this time written differently. I'm over my sad thoughts and onto dealing with my reality in a positive light. Sunday was a great day for our family and I look forward to supporting Rick in his new calling. I know that he will be great for the ward.